Processing loneliness, defined as the degree to which this body, a willful solitary mass, a tool, communicates with other bodies. I see myself as separate. In groups find differences, not similarities. Feel that might be attributed to my growing up white-cis-male, where individualism is institutional. But this white male body's need for work in a group, for a sense of connection to family and ancestry, is rarely met. They're utopian dreams that I should be denied, because my ancestors created that individualism so denial to groups should be my inherited consequence. It would seem so. But here I am among this group of nude bodies. Perhaps these are my people?
You might be able to tell that I am queer but the label "unicorn" much more accurately describes me. 3 years ago, when I realized I was such, I felt some sense of belonging to other unicorn bodies, I hadn't felt since being punk. Feeling belonging with punk let me think there must be a way out of loneliness, and how authentically human I am does in fact connect me to others experiences and ancestries, so should also with my own body, a thing I feel so separate from.
Some people just know who they are. They should be the workers. That's not me yet. Seeing my body here is seeing potential work. I can take inventory of what I have, largely in working order. How to act in unison with my tool my body is how I'll do my work. Join me as I transform using the solitary mass you see before you.